Think Win-Win — Part 2

While the first and last paradigms seem almost similar, there is a fundamental difference between them — courage. There are times, especially in business dealings and negotiations, where you get a sense of achieving a win-win situation by compromising a lot on your expected results. That momentarily satisfaction is not a win-win situation. And the fact that it is short lived, post which you are bound to experience some level of resentment, is enough to indicate that it is only an illusion of a win-win situation. In order to achieve what we can actually call a win-win situation, one needs to identify their principles as well as the desired end results. Although, there is always scope for a certain amount of trade-off that has to be done in order to achieve common grounds, but the sixth paradigm makes sure that you do not deviate from your fundamental principles and the core of your purpose. It means that in case there are two people who cannot find a solution benefiting both of them, then they can agree to disagree. A win-win situation includes high consideration for the person you are dealing with as well as high courage to ensure that you do not divert from your goals. (As also depicted in the below image.)

Courage versus Consideration

There are multiple dimensions of achieving a win-win situation:

Character

Character is the foundation of win-win, and everything else builds on that foundation. There are three character traits essential to the win-win paradigm.

Integrity: There’s no way to go for a win in our own lives if we don’t even know, in a deep sense, what constitutes a win — what is, in fact, harmonious with our innermost values. And if we can’t make and keep commitments to ourselves as well as to others, our commitments become meaningless.

Maturity: Maturity is the balance between courage and consideration. If a person can express his feelings and convictions with courage balanced with consideration for the feelings and convictions of another person, he is mature, particularly if the issue is very important to both parties.

Abundance Mentality: Having an abundance mentality is one of the most critical part of being able to achieve a win-win situation. It means having firm belief that there is plenty out there for everyone. The opposite of the abundance mentality is the Scarcity mentality. People with the scarcity mentality feel that there is very little out there for them to grab and thus, it generates a sense of insecurity with in them. This insecurity germinates as a behavioural change and aligns the focus only on the win, and sometimes, even on a win-lose situation. Abundance mentality, on the other hand allows you to acknowledge the wants and expectations of others and removes the feeling of insecurity.

Relationships

From the foundation of character, we build and maintain win-win relationships. The trust, the Emotional Bank Account, is the essence of win-win. Without trust, the best we can do is compromise; without trust, we lack the credibility for open, mutual learning and communication and real creativity.

Agreements

From relationships flow the agreements that give definition and direction to win-win. They are sometimes called performance agreements or partnership agreements, or shifting the paradigm of productive interaction from vertical to horizontal, from hovering supervision to self-supervision, from positioning to being partners in success.

To summarise, win-win is not a personality technique. It’s a total paradigm of human interaction. It comes from a character of integrity, maturity, and the Abundance Mentality. It grows out of high-trust relationships. It is embodied in agreements that effectively clarify and manage expectations as well as accomplishments. It thrives in supportive systems. There can be no friendship without confidence, and no confidence without integrity

~ Inspired by the Seven Habits of Extremely Effective People